farts

today I had an awesome fart.  I was walking and whistling a song and perfectly timed my fart to when the drummer would have hit the cymbal in the actual song.  Twice.  In a row.  I looked around and nobody was there.  I was hoping that it would be like the first week of college when I trumpet farted and because of that I made new friends. 

But there was no Zisk to be found.  No Green Thumb around.  No Bertus to astound.  No rambunctious ohio statian to take naps on the ground.  I was alone.  holding my phone.  giggling at the tone. of my fart.

That was a new segment called "somewhat sentimental rhyming about farts."  don't expect to see that one very often.

Is there a name for when you try to fart when you have to pee and you accidentally leak a little bit out?  Not that I just almost did that or anything.  But really, is there a name?  I would appreciate the real name for it or any fake name that sounds plausible.  Like balderdash.

I slept till 10:45 today.  Felt fantastic.  Never underestimate the importance of sleep or keeping your feet warm.  There's a reason why lieutenant Dan told Forrest Gump to always keep extra socks.
IT'S GOOD FOR YOU

This blog needs a picture.

Raichu brings to you another haiku (part 2!)
farts will make you friends
especially in grad school
such maturity.

I miss my farmer's tan.  That thing was gorgeous.  I wish I could have a completely tan lower body and a farmers tan at the same time.  Leg tan lines are lame.  Arm tan lines are funny.  You heard it here first.  Tan your butt.

One time somebody called me sweats mcgee.  Have I given myself a mcgee nickname yet? well either way.  Sweats McGee it is.