GOOD MORNING

Well it's that time of day again everyone.  Time to buckle those seatbelts, put on your safety glasses, swoop loop and pull those shoelaces, zip up your jackets, put on your helmets and elbow pads, and get ready because it's time to...

READ!
THIS!
BLOG!

You're psyched now aren't you?  Yeah you are.  I can feel it.  Nobody is even reading this right now but I can feel your future excitement because you just love my blog so much.  Ya you do.  You don't have to tell me.  I will have been there.  In the future. When you read this.  So right......NOW. right NOW.

I've been in a fantastic mood the past couple of days.  Just psyched on my whole life.  Sometimes you just gotta be psyched.  Even though it's too hot to even consider going outside and I'm gonna have to study for like 4 hours today, I just have a good feeling about today.

I would like to endorse a product today.  EAT THIS IT IS FANTASTIC

Did you hear about Buzz Aldrin punching a dude in the face?  Here's the video, I'm really just impressed that he lasted as long as he did before giving this guy a fist full of America to the face.

I love this guy's argument.  "hey Buzz you never went to the moon. stop lying, liars go to hell."

Oh ok bro.  Ya I guess you're right, when you put it that way.  I mean I am super old, maybe I never did go to the moon.  You know what, just put that Bible in front of my face so I can finally tell the truth about how I never went to the BOOM THAT WAS MY FIST SON! BYAAAAAAH! SUCK IT NERD I'VE BEEN TO THE MOON!

I'm sure that's exactly how it went, even though I just saw the video and none of that actually happened.  When they make a movie about Buzz Aldrin it will go like that.  Oh, you mean they already did make a movie about Buzz Aldrin?  Oh alright well if they can make 2 Hulk movies in like 4 months, they can make another Buzz Aldrin movie.  What a sick name.  Buzz.  My first son's name will be Buzz Guy Lowey.  The 2 sickest names combined into one glorious man baby that will be an astronaut all by himself and get to Mars without a space program and be the first person to do a 360 flip in space.  Maybe I should set my expectations lower, but I won't.

It feels like somehow all my blogs end up talking about space recently.  At least like 3 of them.  I guess I really do have some sort of deep seeded separation anxiety with the space program.  I mean come on, space is so cool.  Anyone who doesn't think space is cool is the worst.  I would literally sell my soul to go to space. 
Let me tell you why: first of all, I don't even know if I have a soul.  No idea if souls actually exist.  You know what definitely exists? you guessed it, SPACE.  Secondly, no gravity.  let me say that again-THERE IS NO GRAVITY.  How cool would that be?  Just floating around all the time.  I can't even float in water.  It would be the most comfortable you've ever been, but all the time.  Super cool.
Lastly, I'm pretty sure Alec Baldwin would be narrating my entire time in space.  Everything I would do would be made way cooler by Alec Baldwin telling you how awesome it is. 

Oh and Aliens.  I wanna meet some aliens.  I'm pretty sure that if I manage to get to space, I will be the one to make first contact with real aliens.  I'll be sure to bring my kodak one time use camera so we can get a few snapshots.  Then I'm sure that guy from the Buzz Aldrin video will come bother me about how I didn't really meet aliens and then I can reenact my version of that video. 

I really need to get to space.

Haiku time
space is really cool
aliens and other stuff
please don't probe my butt.

I watched most of Labyrinth last night before I fell asleep.  That's one weird movie.  I had no idea what was going on, but I felt like I was learning valuable life lessons and problem solving skills at the same time.  I think I got smarter and dumber at the same time, so I guess I broke even?  I don't even know.  I was pretty confused by the occasional musical numbers.  it cant be a musical because there's spoken word?  i don't know, I think i'm just gonna go with it and add it to the list of movies that I can say I saw and pretend like it was life changing with everybody else when in reality I didn't get it at all.  I'm really just more of a Dunstin Checks In kind of guy.

Monkeys in people clothes.  I can wrap my head around that.

Time to go be productive.  The call me the ghostblogger