friday is the day that it is today

Hello there boys and girls, men and women, and Shaqtus the big galactus.  Just a heads up, I'll be out of town this weekend so you will be getting no saturday or sunday blogs.  No blog for you.  Come back 3 days.  I would like to wish you all a happy weekend. I hope all of your dreams come true.

That being said, let's get on with the show.  My boy C Woosh suggested to me via text at midnight that I write about clothes trends, especially those that are/were ridiculous.  So here we go with a new segment called "Fashion with your boy C Woosh"

1) JNCO pants

Just gonna throw it out there, I had a pair of JNCO pants in the fourth grade.  For whatever reason, jnco's remind me of juggalos.  Essentially jncos were a way to tell your parents that you hate them.  Look at how big those back pockets are.  Think of all the cargo you could bring with you in those huge pockets.  You could bring spare face paint, your meth pipe, tiny rubber bands for your little braid things that are sticking out of your head, a giant knife, and your wallet all in one pocket.  Useful? yes.  Worth it? probably not.  My grade on jnco pants: D+

2) Tying your shirt around your waist

Honestly this picture has it all.  Shirts around the waist, Tevas, a girl mall grabbing her walmart skateboard, giant knee hole pants.  But for now, we will stick with the shirt belt.  And by we, I mean me because I'm doing all the work here.  Wearing your shirt around your waist is a way of telling people "I can't properly plan my clothes for the weather."  I know it's the 90's, but just take a look at the newspaper or watch the weather channel for 2 minutes.  It's gonna tell you how hot it's gonna be.  You don't need all those layers if it's gonna be 85 out.  Not to mention that you ruin your shirt sleeves.  You can't wear that shirt on your arms anymore because your sleeves are so wrinkled.  Come on 90's teenagers.  Show a little pride and stop mall grabbing.  I mean wearing shirt belts.  Grade for shirt belts: C-.

I'll do one more of these for C woosh and then it's onto haiku time because, let's face it, I'm the voice of a generation.

3) Hats with brims up

This is a style that I could get behind.  Look at that tiny hat and funny shaped brim.  funny hats have always held a dear place in my heart.  I dont know why.  Umbrella hats, turquoise hats with self-drawn street pirates, my boy Wesley's hat in that picture.  I love em all.  I wish that I was old enough to have been choosing my own clothes during this trend because I woulda rocked it super hard.  Wearing your hat with the brim up is the best way to communicate to the world "I kill it harder than you."  Grade for hats with brim up: A.  I don't believe in A+'s because I think it distorts the GPA scale.  What, you got a 4.33 out of 4.0?  You're lying and you don't deserve to be in college.

Haiku time

Thanks a lot C woosh
This is a sick new segment
but now it's over

I require feedback on fashion with c woosh.  It's up in the air.  I write to please.  Myself.  All feedback will be accepted, but only if it comes from me.  Feel free to inception me.

The color of the day is eggshell white

Shout out to my boys at art-paints.com for hooking me up with this exclusive jpg from google.  Thanks guys.  I appreciate the special celebrity treatment.  I'm happy to spread the word about your website to countries like India, Canada, Germany, and the UK.  They love me over there.  I'm like the claw to those green alien toys in Toy Story.  They do my will.

I would like to write one more haiku today, because as I understand it my boy Green Thumb started PT school today and he's really the only one who cares about these haikus.
grad school in jersey
prepare for it in your butt
from roommate grandma

I know that haiku probably didn't make sense to anyone, but i'm laughing out loud by myself right now. Shout out to jablonskeet.  Sorry everyone in Missouri for none of this making sense, but I'm internationally known now and I have to cater to my massive audience.

Also I decided on a shankar emoticon yesterday
:fl
I think that's about as good as I can get.

Time for the hardest part of writing this every day.  I hope at least one of you figures this one out.

They call me the eht em llac yehT