glorious morning

why do I ever even bother getting out of bed?  so far I've been awake for 3 hours and the worst part of my day has been breakfast when I ate chocolate chip pancakes because I had to get out of bed.  I need a super bed/kitchen hybrid.  But one that defies gravity so I can cook on a vertical axis while I lay on a horizontal one.  I want to a stove and countertop that I can slide in and out of my wall that has a horizontal gravity vector.  That way I can cut stuff and cook right in front of my face as I lay down and not have to worry about stuff falling onto my bed.  If I was a superhero I think that would be my power.  Spontaneous gravity direction changes.  How cool would it be if you could just make people freefall along the ground instead of towards it?  It would be like that backstreet boys or nsync music video where they're in that rotating room and they're like standing on the roof and on walls and stuff.  This one.  But instead of being a boy band video it would be real life.  I want to be able to just make people fall in strange directions.  Can you imagine changing gravity like 10 degrees and watch everybody walking it some strange semi vertical orientation?  That would be a good idea for the SIMS games or rollercoaster tycoon if they still make those.  Slight gravity alteration mode. everybody would slide to one part of the screen.  Do you think they have rooms like that in real life?  Like how they have anti-gravity rooms for NASA.  They have those right?  I need to know.  Someone help me.  Please god someone help me! AAAAAAHHHHHHH eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

I went back and read yesterday's post because I was curious what goes through tired Drew's head.  That is one scary place.  Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if I was way stupider, and I think that's what it's like.  The scary part is that you can't even tell when you're stupid because it's all still stream of consciousness anyway.  It's impossible to know that you are stupid until after you've already been stupid.  I think I just blew my own mind.  I would also like to point out that when you free the dragonfly from the spider's web, you may have saved the dragonfly but you have condemned the spider.  The best part about that last sentence is that even if you weren't there to know what I'm talking about, you still probably understand what is going on as well or even better than I do.  Let me guess.  You're confused right........NOW.  right NOW.  NOW.

I would like to start a new segment today that will probably go no further than today, but there is a chance that it might.  This segment is called "I made friends with someone once by doing this."

Today on "I made friends with someone once by doing this,"  I would like to tell the story about how I became friends with Jeff Todef.  We were packing up the boats for a race in Philly, and they wanted us to take all the seats off so they didn't bounce around.  I couldn't figure it out, so I started hitting the seat and making monkey sounds.  One person laughed.  It was Jeff. We were now friends.  Then.  We were now then friends.  Then we became friends.  At that moment.  At that moment we were then friends.  I don't understand the tense organization to that statement.  Grammar is overrated, except for on comment sections on CNN.com articles.

So far today I have not sweated sitting down.

The new iphone will be announced in 3 days.  That means I will be getting a new phone in a matter of a couple weeks.  Start the countdown for total blog domination.  Blogination.  They will henceforth call me the bloginator.

I'm pretty sure I'm stupid now.  My idiocy is becoming self-aware.  Get ready for a terminator-type rise of the stupidity.  Terminator 5:  The Bloginator.  No one's intelligence is safe

at concert last night
almost fell asleep standing
almost means I did

German haiku me Tim!  I need to have comments on these or my self esteem takes a hit.  They call me emotionally-dependent-on-my-internet-social-life Drew